Bono? And All We Got was Murphy Brown

This year's commencement line up is pretty stellar. They stuck my class with some spoiled blond art history major drop out who just happened to have a hit TV show. Oh, yeah, and some pioneering lawyer from South Africa, but we couldn't hear his speech because the acoustics were really bad. I was sitting next to this little weirdo and another friend who was really into frogs. This chick behind us kept bemoaning the fact that all her hard work and her academic honors (she was cum something) were meaningless. Meaningless! Her pal's efforts to comfort her were hindered by the champagne snarfing through her nose.