Operation Get Ass Out of Door

In the never ending quest to get my nautical geek on, I visited the submarine Becuna at the Independence Seaport Museum on Saturday. I was the only single lady visitor on board. Surprise. No, I wasn't looking for love on a submarine. Much like being the only girl in the rocket club or improv group, being the only available chick in the place was nothing to get excited about. In fact, my female presence seemed to scare the hell out of one cluster of geek guys inspecting the Becuna's innards. The poor things thought they'd found the one place outside of their basements that was girl-free. Ha!

Part of the joy of 20th century history tourism is meeting some of the actual players. Look, ma, real World War II Vets! Can I pet them? Some Walter Matthau looking guy showed me the periscope and I got to ask another wiry little WWII Navy veteran brilliant questions like "What did you eat on the submarine? Dried foods?" and "Did you get enough exercise? (never mind the global war raging around you)?". There's always a extra expert in any tour group, in this case a younger veteran who was with is wife, of course, who has to talk as much as the official docents. I wanted to say look, I'm here to listen to the really old guy, so shut up.

I felt a bit old myself as a little girl asked her dad, "Was this submarine in World War II and The Cold War?" I know that Berlin wall falling isn't news, but when something spans the first 2 decades of your life, it's hard to let go.

I honored the submarine vets with my ability to make a simple exit into a potential I Love Lucy routine. As I was climbing out of the conning tower, my foot got stuck in the hatch. With one foot tenuously planted on the deck, the other still in the tower and my left leg balanced oh so gracefully perpendicular to the deck, I had to resist the urge (yes, I have these urges) to lose my balance completely and fall over the railing chain and into the river. "You're gonna break your leg!" called out the wiry sub vet. Just doing my part to entertain the troops.