Laziest Heterosexual on Earth

It's taking me ages to complete my OKCupid online dating profile. Filing my income tax was so much easier and much more fulfilling.

I grudgingly play along with the idea that listing my movies and hobbies will reveal "something special" about me to a potential "mate." I ignore the fact that in all my pictures, no matter who takes them, I seem to look like my father in drag. I haven't looked at any man's profile yet, but I'd better do that, too, as if that will reveal something special about him.

What is easy is answering the endless supply of match questions. I skip the ones that seem poorly conceived or involve hypothetical human flesh eating and such.