Take Our Mothers to Work Day

In what I fear is the first of many role reversals to come, I took my mother to work with me today. I didn't bring any coloring books or puzzles for her to play with, but fortunately, her cell phone and Neiman Marcus catalog are keeping her out of trouble.

Beige is the New Beige: Home Decor from a Place of Fear

With the help of Lipby, I was finally able to bring home the couch of my dreams. It's not a big couch. And it's beige. Because my home decor, like many nightmares, is inspired by fear.

My greatest decorating fear is that I will get sick of anything too spectacular or exciting. Now I am drawn to magenta and orange, but how long can that last? I never loved vanilla and I will never hate it. I once loved chunky monkey ice cream, now I can't stand it.

Worst of all for a tiny apartment dweller is the fear of shelves and wall hangings placed over my head.

Then there's the groundless fear that I am decorating my apartment "wrong," that reality show apartment judges will burst in to the place and berate my lack of style in foreign accents.

I must wake up from this neutral toned nightmare!

Mass Quantities

What have I been doing for the past few weeks? Eating mass quantities of grilled food, drinking much beer, trying to play ultimate, procrastinating on exercise, waiting to buy a love seat, reconsolidating student loans, undercooking potatoes, crocheting small bags and an exquisite washcloth, thinking too much about the movie Cars, looking at relatives look at the Amish, spotting an elderly usher around the neighborhood, bracing myself for new attempts to find dates, drawing conceptual maps of various media, rethinking what the hell I ought to be doing at work, dreaming weird-ass dreams, scratching mosquito bites.